How I Learned to Burn Shit.

Submitted by: The Skyeye

Time: June 1968
Place: 90th Replacement Company, Long Binh, RVN

Like many young soldiers, I was processed through the 90th Replacement
Company.  It was mandatory to attend morning formation in order to
receive your duty assignments.

The very first day the First Sergeant read off the list of guys with
assignments and where to go get transportation.  Then, he looked over
the rest of us and in classic First Sergeant manner pointed to three of
us and said, "youse mens go with this here acting corporeal,  he has a
job for you".

The job was burning shit.  There were three or four 20 hole crappers in
the area which needed our undivided attention.  The drill was to pull
out half of the drums of crap at a time and burn them.  The technique
was to put a couple of quarts of diesel fuel in a drum, light it off and
stir it with some rebar till dry.  That took most of the day.

With my luck I got tapped for the same duty the next day.

On the third day, being experienced, and the acting corporeal having
gotten orders, I was given the acting Corporals armband and three other
FNGs to go burn shit. Again.

My innovation was to put ALL the drums into a long, triple-wide row and
pour in not just a few quarts of diesel, but several gallons into each
drum and light it all off.  No more stirring for me.  The flames turned
the drums white hot and produced a spectacular column of black smoke.

This attracted the attention of the ever alert First Sergeant who came
running and shrieking: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING!  WHAT ARE YOU DOING!”

The answer of course was: “Burning shit Sarge.”