Creatures From Hell

Submitted by: Gawfer, USN

While serving in the United States Navy, I had the fortune of being stationed on “the Rock,” otherwise known as Okinawa, Japan. Now, anyone who reads the musings of my friend John has a pretty good idea that the rock is mostly tropical in climate, and comes with all the accessories that one might find in said climate such as poisonous snakes, enormous spiders, and ferocious cockroaches. This memory is about the latter: cockroaches.

Those who are from the south can identify with these creatures that I believe are from the bowels of hell itself. They are filthy, disgusting insects that given the right climate seem to grow as large as house cats, and when approached will launch themselves into the air, flying with as much skill as any F/A18 driver

On a particular evening while walking up the hill to my car for a date with a young dependant, I noticed one of these bad boys working its way through the long, un-mowed grass toward my off base house. I immediately sprang into action, jumping 3 feet in the air and coming down hard with the heel of my platformed boot (late 70’s era). Drawing back my leg to view the carnage I had just caused, I struggled to see the remains. It was getting dark, but I thought I’d certainly be able to see the brown shell and white guts smeared on the grass… when, without warning, I felt the critter on the inside of my right thigh! It had expertly jumped at just the right time straight up into the pant leg of my burgundy angel-flight disco pants and was heading toward unknown parts. The only thing I could do in my panic was to grab it through the fabric and squeeze until I felt the cracking of its hard shell, then hobbled back into the house to change into some halfway clean dungarees for my date.

Still shivering with disgust, I related the story to my pretty young lass, afterward realizing by the look on her face, that cockroaches were not at all good dinner conversation. I still revile those creatures from hell.

Submitted by,

Gawfer, USN